Certain thoughts keep me up at night. I have 3 kids ranging from 20 to 12.
At what point do you trust your kid to make the right choices?
Do you keep them in a bubble till they move out? Do you just let them go as soon as they drive? When is the right time?
I've had my parenting questioned because my 20year old watches rated R and unrated movies. Not many unrated movies, he mainly watches shows that are on Adult Swim. While I hate those shows because they are crude cartoons that I think drag young kids in adult thought processes, I don't begrudge my 20yr old those shows. He is 20. While I am here to dig my heels in when it comes to drugs and drinking and things I don't approve of, I am not that stringent on what he watches. He is classified an adult. The only barriers from being equal to his dad at me are experiences and the ability to drink legally.
The one questioning me is actually the polar opposite of me she has a 17yr old that she pumps for information and doesn't trust as far as she could throw her. Mind you, her daughter, which happens to be my sons gf has never done anything that a lot of teenagers do like sneak out, drink, had sex or anything that would make a parent cringe other than voice her opinion on things.
IMO when you hold on too closely you miss the opportunity to allow your child to grow and experience life. If you hold on till they leave then you miss prime opportunity to mentor your child. You show lack of faith in God and in your child.
I love my children with all my heart but when someone questions my intelligence, my character or my children when they have given no provocation for such, it enrages me. It grieves me. It puts me in a quandary as to the intelligence of someone who felt the need to dig through private business to decide that the person that they once called about because he wasn't moving fast enough for their taste is now some lowlife pervert.
While I don't expect anyone to get this post(If anyone ever read it) I do thank God that I am allowed to voice my opinion in this manner so I can think things through.
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Friday, March 4, 2011
Struggling
I have not been faithful posting here. My life being the train headed towards the derailment that it is, is just to insane. I don't know if mom or one of the kids will be calling me away or side tracking me.
I need to confess. I try to walk the walk when it comes to dealing with my family but I feel like I am loosing it. My husband can't figure out why I cry so much but I hear him gripe about my mother, my mother gripes about everything while sitting on her throne chain smoking.
To help level me out I need silence, mom on the other hand has to have background noise on all the time. I try to follow the commandments but she makes it hard. "Honor thy mother and thy father.''
Well mom makes sure that I earn that badge. She won't be quiet, she won't be nice and she chain smokes. I am allergic to smoke so that makes her smoke more.
Last year when she was going through the cancer I was the one that would get up at 3 or 4 to take her to MD Anderson. I would get home by 11 if I was lucky. The next day I would look like the zombie that I felt like at work.
My sister took her a couple of times when I forced the issue but taking care of an elderly parent is hard. I uprooted my family to move in to take care of her and help her, financially and medically. I just wish she could appreciate the sacrifice that Chris and I have made to help her.
I dream of having my own home, a space where everyone could spread out and a place where I can sit on a couch and talk on the phone. Not hide in the bathroom just trying to hold a conversation. We are paying off debt but its slow because as soon as we pay something off hubs has to charge something.
I guess I am writing today to get out some of my frustration, sadness and general downer mood.
Lord help me find joy again.
I need to confess. I try to walk the walk when it comes to dealing with my family but I feel like I am loosing it. My husband can't figure out why I cry so much but I hear him gripe about my mother, my mother gripes about everything while sitting on her throne chain smoking.
To help level me out I need silence, mom on the other hand has to have background noise on all the time. I try to follow the commandments but she makes it hard. "Honor thy mother and thy father.''
Well mom makes sure that I earn that badge. She won't be quiet, she won't be nice and she chain smokes. I am allergic to smoke so that makes her smoke more.
Last year when she was going through the cancer I was the one that would get up at 3 or 4 to take her to MD Anderson. I would get home by 11 if I was lucky. The next day I would look like the zombie that I felt like at work.
My sister took her a couple of times when I forced the issue but taking care of an elderly parent is hard. I uprooted my family to move in to take care of her and help her, financially and medically. I just wish she could appreciate the sacrifice that Chris and I have made to help her.
I dream of having my own home, a space where everyone could spread out and a place where I can sit on a couch and talk on the phone. Not hide in the bathroom just trying to hold a conversation. We are paying off debt but its slow because as soon as we pay something off hubs has to charge something.
I guess I am writing today to get out some of my frustration, sadness and general downer mood.
Lord help me find joy again.
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